The Killer Jargon of #SXSWi, Part 2: Bring the Gibberish

See Part 1 here.

If South by Southwest Interactive (or SXSWi, for those in the know) is good for anything, it’s breaking news that makes no freaking sense whatsoever if you don’t already know the names of the companies and apps at issue.

I was thinking about sending gibberish tweets involving SXSW-style jargon using the #SXSWi hashtag, just for fun and because I’m kind of a snarky ass. My Twitter handle is @wellslawoffice, though, so it doesn’t look all that credible coming from me.

I heard Facebook crimped the OS for Orange Gazelle right as the Zebra Sponge purchase was undergoing Slideshow review. Muskox is gonna be *pissed*.

Via lemmetweetthatforyou.com

I could start a @BreakingInteractiveNews account, I suppose….

Most of my ideas are pretty mean, could possibly lead to at least some civil suits, and really just need to remain ideas in my twisted brain…… Not that I’ve ever let that stop me before.

Location-based apps seem to be all the rage right now. Hmmmmmm……. Continue reading

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The Killer Jargon of #SXSWi, Part 1: WTH Are You Talking About?

South by Southwest, or SXSW, as it is more commonly known these days (or #SXSW, as it more commonly appears in online references these days) is now underway, with the Interactive portion of the festival, or #SXSWi, having begun this past Thursday. I attended this part of the event as a full-fledged badge holder in 2012 and 2013, and I may do so again some day, but there is also some value in observing the festivities from afar.

One aspect of SXSWi that particularly jumps out at me is the near-total inscrutability of much of its news and gossip, especially with regard to the quest to be this year’s “it” app. Take this headline, posted to Facebook by my friend Jen: “Twitter cuts Meerkat off from its social graph just as SXSW gets started.”

Literally nothing in that headline, or the comments to Jen’s post, makes any sense at all without heaping amounts of context. I initially just assumed that Meerkat and Periscope are companies, or apps, or websites, or programming languages, or something else tech-y. It’s just funny how the tech world has normalized jargon so much. Continue reading

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My Moment of Internet Fame, Dapper Octopus Edition (UPDATED x2)

I’m just going to take a moment to toot my own horn and salute a pseudonymous Photoshop wizard. This is the story of how a funny picture I found, along with the caption I gave it, spent a few moments near the top of Reddit. (The story consists almost entirely of pictures, so chill.)

The picture apparently first popped up on Pinterest, and then made its way to Reddit, where someone, possibly a user named Zelvetical, gave the little guy a top hat:

3pcLS-1

I found it on a site called Dark Roasted Blend, and proceeded to share it on Facebook, then on Tumblr, where I added this caption:

All of human history has led us to the moment that we developed the technology to digitally add a top hat to a photo of an adorable miniature octopus.

As of the morning of Saturday, December 29, 2012, the Tumblr post has over 46,000 notes, which is a record for anything I’ve ever posted. Then I got this: Continue reading

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A brave pit bull and a viral internet story

'Baby puppy pit bull, Bach' by Beverly & Pack on Flickr

Not a picture of Chief, but intended to elicit an emotional response

The story of Chief, an American Pit Bull Terrier in the Philippines who sacrificed himself to save his human family from a cobra, showed up on my Tumblr dashboard a little while ago. It is a beautiful but tragic story, evoking all of the emotions that dog stories like that tend to do. It also set off some skepticism warning bells for me, since the internet has a way of embellishing and propagating stories well beyond the original facts. Chief’s story needs to be told, but in order to be told it also needs to be true, and supported by news sources.

WARNING:  Some of the links below include a picture that might be Chief but is definitely triggering.

Hopeful Veterinarian posted a link on Tumblr on March 19 that leads to a post on the blog Cool Story, Dog! dated March 13, 2012. That post contains no external links, which is what caused my initial skepticism.

A Google search led to a post on pets.ohio.com dated October 27, 2009. The cited source is a March 1, 2007 DogsInTheNews.com post. This post leads to what appears to be the actual source material:

  • A post dated February 16, 2007, authored by Herbie Gomez, on the blog site for the Cagayan de Oro Journal;
  • An article dated February 24, 2007 in the Manila Times (dead link); and
  • A post to the site forum.dog-tracker.com (access forbidden).

The incident evidently occurred on Monday, February 12, 2007, in Cagayan de Oro City, Philippines, a city of just over 500,000 people on the island of Mindanao. The article has some journalistic problems (secondhand quotes and such), but it lays out the entire story rather well. From the Cagayan de Oro Journal post:

A pit bull terrier proved beyond doubt that a dog can become a man’s best friend when it saved and gave its life for its master’s wife and her grandmother in Barangay Lapasan here.

The dog named “Chief,” saved 87-year-old Liberata la Victoria and her granddaughter Maria Victoria Fronteras from a cobra that snaked through an opening in the family’s kitchen shortly around 8 a.m. Monday.

On two occasions, the snake was about to attack the women when the dog dashed from a corner and used itself as a shield.

Marlone Fronteras, an employee of Nestle Philippines who owned the terrier, said Chief seized the venomous snake in the neck with its teeth and repeatedly slammed it on the floor until it died.

The dog was bitten too by the cobra; it died a few minutes later after giving its master a farewell gaze, according to the dog owner’s friends Mare Sabelita and Derf Ian dela Rama.

***

“The snake was in front of us., maneuvering a deadly attack,” Sabelita quoted Maria Victoria as saying. “I screamed out loud to ask for help.”

Hearing this, the four-year old pit bull terrier dashed from its sleeping area to fight off the deadly snake, said Sabelita quoting Maria Victoria.

The cobra fought back and bit Chief at the lower left portion of the jaw. The dog then repeatedly slammed the cobra after it succeeded in immobilizing the snake with its sharp teeth, she said.

Dela Rama said la Victoria was watching television when she panicked and alerted her granddaughter. The old lady said the cobra was about to attack her and the dog came to her rescue.

Maria Victoria said she saw the cobra expand its neck as soon as she turned the lights on. She said the cobra looked like it was spitting as its inched closer, about a meter away, toward her.

De la Rama said the terrier, “out of nowhere,” jumped on the cobra , bit it the neck, and then shook it till it died.

Moments later, the dog slouched flat and fainted, spreading its arms and feet on the floor, after killing the killer snake.

De la Rama said the dog went wobbly and lost control of its organs some 30 minutes after being bitten by the cobra; it started to urinate and defecate uncontrollably as it grasped for air and panted heavily.

The Fronterases sought the help of veterinarian but they were reportedly told that it was too late because the snake bite was near the dog’s brain and the venom had already spread.

Sabilita said Marlone rushed home when his wife called him up to tell him of what had happened and the dog’s master was stunned.

The Fronteras children, who treated Chief like a member of the family and who called the dog “Kuya Chief,” were deeply affected, according to Sabelita.

The last thing Chief did was waggle its tail and gaze at Marlone who had just come from work, said Sabelita.

“Chief gave his two deep breaths and died. (It) was fighting and saving (its) last ounces of breath to see a glimpse of (its) master for the last two seconds of (its) life,” added dela Rama.

Sabelita said he hoped people would change how they look at pit bull terriers, a breed strongly discouraged in many countries and banned because of their “cruel looks.”

We never get the change [sic] to know them more,” said Sabelita.

I don’t know what caused this story to start showing up online again five years after the fact, but I am glad it did.

Photo credit: ‘Baby puppy pit bull, Bach’ by Beverly & Pack on Flickr.

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