This Week in WTF, June 14, 2013

Zero Nerf Tolerance: A school in Edmonds, Washington suspended a group of students who brought Nerf guns to school, which is not all that surprising given schools’ “zero tolerance” policy for anything resembling childhood. What makes it interesting is that the Nerf guns were supposedly part of a school project, and that the kids claim they had their teacher’s permission to have them. Their parents are less than thrilled. In an unrelated incident, school officials in Maryland caught a kindergarten student with a cap gun. Again, zero tolerance blah blah blah, but they allegedly held him for questioning for two hours without calling anybody, and frightened the child to the point that he wet himself. That’ll teach him to trust school administrators! (Maybe that wasn’t the lesson they intended…)

I could conceivably see some trademark issues here... (© @KUboobs/Twitter)

I could conceivably see some trademark issues here… (© @KUboobs/Twitter)

Branded in Kansas: If you want to highlight the cleavage of a major Midwestern university’s coeds, be sure not to use the school’s logo or name in a commercial way. That seems to be the trouble with @KUboobs, a Twitter page that posts “boob selfies” featuring cleavage under University of Kansas t-shirts:

The trend began after University of Kansas student Tiffany Kent tweeted a photo of her breasts in a Jayhawks shirt with the hashtag #kuboobs in the hope of boosting support for her struggling college basketball team during a game in February last year.

The move proved to be a successful one, inspiring a sensational turnaround for the Jayhawks, from a 19-point deficit to a one-point-lead over the Missouri Tigers by the end of the game.

The trend has since gone nationwide too, with over 30 spin-off ‘boobs’ Twitter accounts dedicated to cleavage-led support for other colleges, such as @UF_Boobs@bamaboobs@arboobs and @vandyboobs.

The page has over 62,000 followers, but the university sent a cease and desist letter objecting to the sale of unauthorized merchandise bearing KU and Jayhawk brands. This led to a campaign to save the page, which uses the hashtag #saveKUboobs. The school’s athletic director emphasized that they were not trying to shut down the Twitter page, but rather to stop the sale of trademark-infringing merchandise.

Lest you think that @KUboobs is just about boobs, they engage in charitable activities involving boobs as well:

The Pirates of Cornwall: Senegalese authorities arrested two Cornish men who converted a yacht into a warship, sort of, and then took it from a Spanish impound in the Canary Islands. Because this story would be very boring without the words “marine commandos,”

It had sailed from Pendennis Point on April 16 under skipper Chris Enmarch, from Penryn, and crew member Andrew Bayliss from Saltash, among others.

An inspection by the Spanish authorities found no working guns or ammunition on the 127ft Defender, which is registered as a yacht.

Enmarch, who bought the ship in 2011, was fined €40,000 as waste systems did not meet standards set for pleasure vessels.

The ship’s British pendant was removed and it was placed under the custody of armed Civil Guards. In the early hours of May 31 while the guards were called away the Defender escaped – with the fine outstanding.

Five days later the former gunship was intercepted in Senegalese waters and boarded by marine commandos.

Let me be clear: there is no indication that the men intended to use their warship for piracy. It might have been the result of a game of Truth or Dare that went way too far.

What Could Possibly Go Wrong?: A newly-opened gun range in north Texas allows customers to shoot at targets from a helicopter. In flight.

Some of the neighbors aren’t happy about this.

Available without a background check.

Available without a background check.

Stiletto Heels Don’t Kill People…: A Houston woman faces murder charges for allegedly beating her boyfriend to death with her stiletto high-heel shoe at her apartment, after an argument at a bar. The DA noted that both “wine and tequila” were involved, which strikes me as an odd detail to include.

Remembering What’s Important, Or Something: Just about everyone on the planet who’s seen the video agrees that Taylor Chapman is a bad person. She’s the 27 year-old in Florida who raised hell in a Dunkin Donuts, complete with multiple racist slurs, because she didn’t get a receipt with her order, and who proudly posted her idiotic tirade to YouTube or Facebook or something. The teenage Dunkin Donuts employee who primarily dealt with her, along with all the other employees, deserve a medal or something.

The point of contention, at least for some people on the internet, is whether or not Taylor Chapman is hot. She might, at least in one picture, bear a passing resemblance to Leslie Bibb of Talladega Nights fame, but not really. Anyway, who really cares?

Via everyjoe.com/© 2006 Getty Images

Via everyjoe.com/© 2006 Getty Images

Photo credits: © @KUboobs/Twitter [Fair use]; Maegan Tintari [CC-BY-2.0], via Wikimedia Commons; Via everyjoe.com; © 2006 Getty Images, via famouspeoplephoto.com.

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