A member of a documentary film crew managed to escape with only cuts and scratches when a lioness attacked him in someone’s living room last November, as reported by News 4 San Antonio (h/t Lindsay).

You might be wondering what a lioness was doing in a living room in the Czech Republic. The article doesn’t really say, but it does claim that “[t]he lioness had been domesticated since birth.”

No. No no no no no. In fact, no × ∞.

“Domestication” takes multiple generations—it’s the process by which the wolf became the dog, the junglefowl became the chicken, the aurochs became the cow, or the cat became the, uh……cat.

I think they meant to say that this particular lion was born in captivity. Even that doesn’t necessarily mean that she has been tamed, and it absolutely does not mean that she has been “domesticated.”

Do not bring a lion into your living room. Just don’t. Please.

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For additional information, see these charts on how to pet an animal properly. For example, here’s the chart explaining how to pet a wolverine:

Here’s a hint: do not attempt to pet a wolverine.