Republican Homoeroticism

20120815-232838.jpgGreat quote from John Cole on the fawning, occasionally drooling commentary on Paul Ryan:

The greatest irony of this election may be that one of the most anti-gay bigots in the House, Paul Ryan, who has been and will continue to be one of the most virulently anti-gay congressmen, will be the source of some of the biggest mancrush reporting we’ve ever seen. This stuff challenges even the thoroughly embarrassing David BrooksFifty Shades of Gay” reporting regarding John Thune that made us all hysterical, and you can bet your sweet ass we’ll be hearing this shit until we beat down these sociopathic Galtian douchebags on November 6th. This may be the gayest election ever (not that there is anything wrong with that), now that David Gregory and the rest of the lot have two full haired American beauties to dazzle them with their high cheekbones and lean bodies and to tell them they and the rest of the country will get the fiscal spanking they so clearly lust for and desire.

Photo credit: ‘Paul Ryan – Stoaty Weasel’ by ufansius, via Tumblr.

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The Lesbian Cyborg Atheist Who Ran for President

This election cycle seems to be an ever-widening circle of lies sliding along a downward spiral of deception into a morass of strained metaphors. So far, I’ve counted one possible untruth out of Harry Reid, and for Mitt Romney I stopped counting. BooMan captures the essence of why we should not feel bad for any hurt fee-fees Willard might be experiencing:

Mitt Romney isn’t really a Mormon. He’s an atheist who only went along with his father’s faith so he could duck the Vietnam draft. He didn’t actually try to convert anyone when he was in France either. In reality, he spent all his time in Monte Carlo gambling and buying high-end hookers. When his daddy found out what he was doing, he made him come home and marry his high school sweetheart. Actually, he only made him marry her after the second time she got pregnant. The first time, they got an abortion. Then Romney started using some of the mafia connections he had made in Marseilles to import heroin. By the time he became governor, they were flying it straight into a secret airport they set up in the Berkshires. When one of the pilots started to talk, Romney had him killed.

Now, if we started telling these stories to people, and a substantial percentage of the population started to actually believe these stories, and if congressmen humored and even encouraged the people who believed these stories, and if media figures talked about these stories, and if Congress actually had hearings about some of these stories, then Mitt Romney would know what it’s like to be treated like a Democrat.

(h/t DougJ at Balloon Juice)

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A Political Proposal

Some people need to meet their presidential candidates in person, perhaps to size them up. Then again it could be a sort of superstitious need for physical proximity, even if only to stand in the same general presence of the candidate, or even just to meet the candidate’s surrogate or representative. The candidate almost becomes a myth, or a totem, sort of like a rabbit’s foot or Jesus. I’m not one to get all riled up over a politician.

These campaign trips get expensive, though, both in the cost to the campaign itself, and through security costs and disruptions to the host cities. They have to provide security, but they also have to give up a significant part of their city to the candidate’s security apparatus.

So I propose a solution. Figure out how much it will cost the city in lost productivity and public services, then cut a check to the campaign for that amount. The candidate can deliver speeches via webcam, and the rest of us can stay home.

I’m totally kidding, by the way. This would be a terrible idea.

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Why America is Doomed

A commenter on BuzzFeed yesterday suggested that Mitt Romney shouldn’t release his tax returns until Barack Obama releases his school records.

The person who thinks that way deserves someone like Mitt Romney as president. The problem is, it’s not worth hurting the other 299,999,999 people in this country just to teach that asshole a lesson.

UPDATE: It’s actually worse than that: Trump to Romney: Demand Obama’s college records:

Billionaire businessman and Mitt Romney supporter Donald Trump said Monday morning that the GOP nominee should release more of his tax returns — as soon as President Obama releases his college records.

“Obama should give his college applications and records — you talk about transparency,” Mr. Trump said on “Fox and Friends.” “We will learn more about Obama when we look at those college applications than any other thing that can happen.”

***

Nevertheless, Mr. Trump said Republicans should keep pushing on the issue.

“If I were Mitt Romney or advising Mitt Romney, I would say, ‘I will put out all of my records, I’ll go back as far as you want, after you put out your records on college,'” he said.

“I’ll tell you what — the Republicans have to get a lot tougher,” he continued. “They have to get down and dirty also, because that’s what’s happening to them.”

The Obama campaign’s response could be politely summarized as “bite me,” which seems appropriate.

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If this isn’t the greatest meme of the 2012 election season…

There’s been a bit of a blowup over presumptive Republican presidential nominee Willard Mitt Romney’s refusal to disclose more than the last two years of tax returns which, he points out, is more than is required by law. Because what we really want in a president is somehow who does just above the bare minimum. Anyway, it led to this meme, which I admit made me LOL quite a bit:

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Charles Pierce hit on a very important point in Esquire, which may explain the whole debacle:

There is nothing in those tax returns that is in any way illegal. Certainly, there is within them probably a fairly clear illustration about how our tax code — and, indeed, our entire economic system — has been gamed to benefit the folks in Romney’s economic stratum, but that’s hardly a secret anymore. As Paul Krugman said in this morning’s New York Times, that’s what this whole election is going to be about, whether the two candidates like it or not. And I don’t think Romney’s trying to keep secret how much money he’s kicked back to his church, either. Anybody who’s bothered by that is bothered on theological and cultural grounds. All recent evidence to the contrary, Romney’s people, and Romney himself, are not stupid. They know all this as well as anyone else does. He is not fighting the release of these returns to keep us from finding out the dark secrets about how stupid-wealthy he and his family are. He is fighting the release of these returns because he doesn’t think he should have to release them.

It is helpful always to remind yourself that, in the mind of Willard Romney, there are only two kinds of people — himself and his family, and The Help. Throughout his career, and especially throughout his brief political career, Romney has treated The Help with a kind of lordly disdain. It was there when he swooped down from snowy Olympus and shoved an incumbent Republican governor named Jane Swift under a train. It was there in the general election in 2002, when he glibly pushed aside the Democratic candidate, state treasurer Shannon O’Brien, who raised almost all the same issues against Romney that the president and his people are belaboring him with today. The only time it didn’t work was in his race against Senator Edward Kennedy, when Romney found himself up against a candidate with so much money that he couldn’t outspend him, and so much historical gravitas that he couldn’t ignore him.

The Help has no right to go pawing through the family books, giggling at the obvious loopholes and tax dodges, running amok through all the tax shelters, and probably getting their chocolate-y fingerprints all over the pages of the Romney family ledger. And, certainly, those members of The Help in the employ of the president of the United States, who is also part of The Help, have no right to use the nearly comically ostentatious wealth of the Romney as some sort of scrimey political weapon. He does not have to answer to The Help. I mean, jeepers, he’s running for office.
This isn’t stubbornness. That’s often an acquired trait. What this is, fundamentally, is contempt. Contempt for the process, and contempt for the people who make their living in that process, and contempt for the people whose lives depend on that process. There are rules for The Help with which Willard Romney never has had to abide, and he has no intention of starting now. My dear young fellow, this simply is not done.

Because I’m lazy, and because there isn’t much I can add on the silliness of this whole issue, here are some blogs I would have linked to had I written out a full post on this:

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The State Board of Education is up for grabs. Here’s why you should care.

'Museum of Lincolnshire Life, Lincoln, England - DSCF1726' by Green Lane (Own work) [GFDL (www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) or CC-BY-SA-3.0-2.5-2.0-1.0 (www.creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia CommonsDue to some boring political machinations or something, all fifteen seats on Texas’ infamous State Board of Education are up for grabs this year. The SBOE has gone out of its way to embarrass itself, and by extension all Texans, in recent years. Some of the people who want those seats might even be able to find a way to make it worse.

For one thing, many of the Republicans who want seats on the SBOE have all but admitted that they wouldn’t actually do anything if elected:

At least 10 out of 27 Republicans seeking election to the State Board of Education (SBOE), which oversees public education across Texas, say they don’t agree that “it is the government’s responsibility to be sure children are properly educated.” Of 13 Republicans responding to a candidate survey sent out by a collection of religious-right groups, three said they “disagree” with that statement, while another seven said they “strongly disagree.”

Eight Republican candidates in the May 29 SBOE primaries didn’t respond to the survey. Six candidates who are unopposed in their GOP primaries did not get the questionnaire. Just three Republicans affirmed the importance of public education in Texas. The religious-right groups that sponsored the survey (all of which are nonprofit, tax-exempt organizations) didn’t question Democratic candidates.

Maybe “doing nothing” is not the best way to describe it. Doing nothing would be infinitely preferable to what the SBOE has done in recent years.

Another reason to care about this election is because the hijinks of the SBOE has given the Brits just cause to mock us:

Don McLeroy, chairman of the Texas State Board of Education from 2007 to 2009, is a “young earth” creationist. He believes the earth is 6,000 years old, that human beings walked with dinosaurs, and that Noah’s Ark had a unique, multi-level construction that allowed it to house every species of animal, including the dinosaurs.

He has a right to his beliefs, but it’s his views on history that are problematic. McLeroy is part of a large and powerful movement determined to impose a thoroughly distorted, ultra-partisan, Christian nationalist version of US history on America’s public school students. And he has scored stunning successes.

Seriously, what are these people thinking?

Photo credit: ‘Museum of Lincolnshire Life, Lincoln, England – DSCF1726’ by Green Lane (Own work) [GFDL or CC-BY-SA-3.0-2.5-2.0-1.0], via Wikimedia Commons.

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The bullying is not the issue so much as the not remembering

'Romney portrait' by uploader was Evrik (Richard Whitney) [GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) or CC-BY-SA-3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/)], via Wikimedia CommonsIt seems well-established now that presumptive Republican presidential nominee Willard Mitt Romney engaged in acts of bullying against at least one gay classmate when he was in prep school in the 1960’s. For my part, I am a firm believer that the mistakes of youth should not, in and of themselves, define a person’s opportunities as an adult. In other words, I believe people who do stupid, mean, petty, vindictive things in their youth, or even just earlier in adulthood, deserve the opportunity to change and to demonstrate that change to others. When I hear about something someone did in the past, I am at least as interested in what they have to say about it now as I am in what they did. What they did helped create the person they are today, but it is not the only factor.

One of the many tensions in evaluating presidential candidates is that we don’t want to disqualify them based on the stupidity of their youth. George W. Bush’s blanket denial that “when I was young and irresponsible I was young and irresponsible” seems like a good rule. On the other hand, we want to know who these candidates are who seek to lead us (especially when they spend so much time offering us synthetic versions of themselves). We are looking for some piece of evidence, some sign of what makes them who they are. Many of us prize “character above all” in a president and a lot of those hints about presidential character are located in the stories of youth. If you want to be president, your résumé, accomplishments, and experience are not enough. Your origins matter.

Continue reading

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If you can’t be bothered to vote, I can’t be bothered to care about your opinions

'Filthy Habit by SillyPuttyEnemies' by Sillyputtyenemies (Own work) [CC-BY-SA-3.0 (www.creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0) or GFDL (www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html)], via Wikimedia CommonsCity elections are Saturday. Here’s a story about why you should give a shit.

Seven years ago, a tiny percentage of Austin’s voting population voted to ban smoking in bars located within the city limits. Leading up to the election, bar owners split over the proposed ban, and some warned of dire consequences if it did pass. By the end of May 7, 2005, around 5% of the city’s registered voters had weighed in on the question, approving the ban 52% to 48%.

As I recall, there was wailing, gnashing of teeth, and cries that this would destroy the downtown scene once and for all, as people deprived of their right to smoke would simply go elsewhere. I spent an afternoon at Crown and Anchor Pub about a week after the election listening to someone make these dire predictions, only to learn that he hadn’t voted. I had two responses to the people warning of the sky falling, one of which holds true today.

First, this is Austin, Texas, the “Live Music Capital of the World.” Where else are people going to go? San Marcos, where the bars closed at midnight? Round Rock, where the, uh…..well, nothing interesting ever happens in Round Rock. Are smokers going to skip the bars and clubs and just listen to a Bob Schneider CD while chain-smoking in the living room? I seriously doubted it at the time, and the fact that downtown Austin has sprouted multiple high-rises since 2005 seems to support my position that downtown Austin would be just fine.

Second, roughly five percent of the voting population actually voted in that election. I don’t know what percentage of the voting population subsequently whined about the outcome, but I know it was large. If you opposed the ban, yet didn’t vote, shut up. Just shut your pitiful fucking mouth. The ordinance passed by 2,420 votes, according to one crazy libertarian blogger. That’s more than the capacity of Antone’s, sure, but that certainly represents but a fraction of Austin’s smoking population circa 2005.

For my part, I’m glad the ordinance passed. I think people ought to be able to do what they want as long as it doesn’t hurt other people. Smoking bans tread close to the edge of what “hurts” people, in terms of secondhand smoke, but note that the ban didn’t exactly lift the floodgates of nanny-stateism all over the city. Continue reading

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This will be my last (and only) post about Rick Santorum, because talking about him now makes Mitt Romney look good, and that’s bad

'Le masque du clown (Comedia dell’arte)' by David JAGER on FlickrWith Rick Santorum’s “suspension” of his campaign yesterday, Mitt Romney is all but guaranteed the Republican nomination for president now (sorry, Newt) (oh, Ron, are you still here? Sorry, I didn’t see you way over there.)

Here’s my brief take on Romney: he is an out of touch buffoon, and the kind of elitist that Republicans usually love, unless they’re tryin’ to be folksy. He is also quite good at telling people what they want to hear. He morphed from a somewhat-centrist conservative to a faux-right-wing wackjob over the course of a few months, and presumably now he is going to try to dial it back. For my part, at least, I hope everyone remembers that Mitt Romney passed a bill much like Obamacare first, but at least Obama had the cojones to stand up for his version of health care reform.

I will say this for Santorum: he is principled, and he is (mostly) disciplined in standing up for those principles. I won’t call his principles “psychotic,” because mental illness is a real problem that deserves attention and care. Santorum’s principles are regressive, authoritarian, divisive, antiquated, unrealistic, misogynistic, racist, ethnocentric, heteronormative, homophobic, fearful, cowardly, inconsistent, hypocritical, elitist, ignorant, insensitive, oppressive, boring, prudish, and just plain wrong.

An article this morning at The Daily Beast by apparent-crazy-person Patricia Murphy purports to highlight Santorum’s strengths and outline how Romney can emulate them. It is a virtuoso performance of misused words:

As Santorum showed during his speech earlier, and Romney reinforced later, the GOP field has lost something very important with Santorum’s departure—a passionate conservative who speaks from the heart, talking not only about his own life, but the lives of people across America who face the same struggles. The GOP is now left with Romney, a man at odds with his party’s base, but more important, a likely nominee at arm’s length from his party’s heart and soul.

I really hope she defines “the same struggles,” because Santorum tends to speak for the dwindling evangelical white ostensibly-conservative faction of America, and few others.

Even as he withdrew from the race, Santorum framed improving the economy as a fight for a country like the one his grandfather left Italy for, when the American Dream was still possible, a country “willing to raise us up instead of trying to provide for us and do for us what we can better do for ourselves.” He also talked about people who have been left behind during the downturn: “Those who are out there paddling alone, who are feeling left behind and in some respects feeling hopeless.”

At first, I just assumed he meant that he had a grandfather who fought on the Italian campaign in World War II. Oh snap! World War II reference brings instant voter support, right? Actually, through the power of Google and an investment of fifteen seconds (less time than it took to type this paragraph), I learned that he probably means his grandfather Pietro Santorum, who left Italy for America in 1920. This was before Mussolini came to power and during the time the United States was gearing up for the Great Depression. I don’t know what the elder Santorum endured as an immigrant in the United States, but he probably had to deal with demagogue politicians seeking to exploit immigrant populations to score political points. That sort of politician is still around today. Let me think of an example…..Rick Santorum comes to mind.

With a set of core beliefs, it has been easy for Santorum throughout the course of the campaign to stay consistent. While Romney has been defined by the changes in his positions over the years, Santorum’s speech Tuesday was remarkably like every town hall he held in Iowa and like the speech he gave to kick off his campaign nearly a year ago.

There is nothing inherently wrong with changing positions on an issue, but it should be for a valid reason, i.e. new information or evidence, changing circumstances, etc. Romney, by and large, has not had good reasons for changing his positions, unless “this is what I think you want to hear” is a good reason (SPOILER ALERT: It’s not a good reason). Santorum, on the other hand, has had good reasons to change his position on many issues. For example, he would be entirely justified in changing his position on contraception on the grounds that it is the 21st century (or the fact that there are no valid non-Biblical grounds for opposing the legality of contraception, and even the Biblical ground is shaky).

As we all learned, painfully at times, from the George W. Bush administration, being steadfast and resolute does no good if you are wrong.

In June 2011, with his family by his side again, he spoke about his grandfather and the American Dream. He talked about “moral currency,” gas prices, the Obama administration’s record on federal spending, and “the rest of America out here trying to survive.”

It was that line, about “the rest of America,” that made Santorum’s campaign different from the others’ including Romney’s, then and now—an element of compassion that voters recognized and responded to and connected with.

I was smart enough to figure out that if I understood and felt at a very deep level what you were experiencing across America and tried to be a witness to that, tried to be an interpreter of that, that your voice could be heard and miracles could happen and it did,” Santorum told his supporters as he left the race.

Related to an earlier question, who does he mean by “the rest of America?” Does it include all women, not just evangelical ostensibly-conservative ones? Does it include even a single lesbian, gay, bisexual, queer, or trans* person? What about blah people? Surely Rick Santorum has not forgotten about the blah people.

Rick Santorum never had a concrete idea for the economy, jobs, foreign policy, or anything else except regulating what happens inside the American people’s skivvies. Don’t give me any crap about compassion. He may feel things very deeply, but don’t believe for a microsecond that he has remotely the same degree of care or compassion for people who don’t look and think like he does.

The bad news for Romney is that many of Santorum’s strengths are hard to learn. Romney is never going to be born the grandson of a coal miner, and he’ll never struggle to succeed or survive the way so many Americans do.

But like Santorum and like Barack Obama before him, Romney can talk to people who are going through the fire, who feel alone or hopeless, and he can listen to their stories, understand their lives, and infuse his campaign with the humanity that has been missing so far.

If I had a bit more time, I would Photoshop Santorum’s face onto a picture of Loretta Lynn with the caption “Coal Miner’s Grandson,” but I’m not going to do that.

It’s still more than six months to the election. Barack Obama is far from perfect, but then any human being is far from perfect. Mitt Romney is below the median point of perfection and has been steadily digging himself downward. Still, it could be anyone’s ball game seven months from now. I don’t have an especially high opinion of people in large groups, as a review of anything I’ve ever written or said throughout my life will demonstrate. There is a good chance that the electorate going to the polls in November will include at least some portion of the people who did not know the movie “Titanic” was inspired by a true story.

Photo credit: ‘Le masque du clown (Comedia dell’arte)’ by David JAGER on Flickr.

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Hell hath no fury

Presented not for myself, but on behalf of people I care about.

Hell Hath No Fury, graphic by sarahlee310

November 6, 2012: Get your ass out there and vote.

Photo credit: Hell Hath No Fury by sarahlee310

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