Thoughts on Game of Thrones: Blackwater Keep on Rollin’

"Tyrion Battlecry" by ~Kanish, on deviantART

"Tyrion Battlecry" by ~Kanish, on deviantART

To all who lament television’s sharp descent into unscripted hell, “Blackwater” reminded us of what the television medium can do. This was epic storytelling at its finest. Any deficiencies in settings or backdrop, such as the facts that the magnificent city of Qarth appears to be little more than a series of rooms, and Jon Snow’s trek in beyond the Wall seems to involve walking back and forth across a single span of glacier, have led to the spectacle of the Battle of the Blackwater.

Who is the “good guy” in this battle? The lack of an easy answer to that question is at the heart of the story’s genius. We like Tyrion and want him to succeed, but his success most likely means the Lannisters’ success. We don’t much care for Stannis Baratheon, but we like Davos Seaworth. Same problem. The closest thing to a “protagonist” army that we have are those of Robb Stark and Daenerys Targaryen, and we’re beginning to see that they aren’t much better than anyone else.

This episode focused exclusively on the events of a single night in King’s Landing, so we got to see much more development of individual characters than usual. Tyrion got one of the best Braveheart speeches in television history, and finally served as a heroic character rather than a comic one (see last season’s battle fought while Tyrion was unconscious, the only time the show has ever overtly resorted to “dwarf humor.”)

Sansa demonstrated her own strength and leadership when Cersei fled their hiding place with Tommen. Unfortunately, she may have lost the only two people who ever truly protected her in King’s Landing: Tyrion, who is now wounded, and the Hound, who is running away. Cersei at least understands the importance of keeping Sansa alive, but we know that she will not step up to protect Sansa if Joffrey threatens her. Continue reading

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In space, no one can hear you scream, still.

By now everyone has probably seen multiple Prometheus trailers. My favorite is actually still the first teaser trailer, which has almost no dialogue and a lot of loud, scary sound effects:

Maybe it just fits with my ADHD.

What I did not realize, until someone helpfully posted it to YouTube, is that the original trailer for 1979’s Alien used the same creepy sound effect, and it is just as scary. I’ve seen Alien dozens of times, and this still creeps me out:

Less than three weeks to go!

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The worst conceivable reason to get a pet

PhotobucketThe Harry Potter series, as far as we know, is at its end, with the last book published in 2007 and the last film released in 2011. Also at an end, apparently, are the hopes and dreams of the owls that idiots across the UK adopted as pets, based on the popularity of the books and movies. Via The Guardian (h/t io9):

Hundreds of owls are being abandoned across the country after being bought as pets by Harry Potter fans.

Sanctuaries are full of the birds now the craze has faded after the release of the final Harry Potter film last year.

And it’s feared many more have been illegally released into the wild and will have starved to death or taken over territory inhabited by smaller wild owls.

There was a surge in demand for pet owls from fans who fell in love with Harry’s cute companion ­Hedwig.

But the birds, which can live for 20 years, take a lot of looking after – and many owners have become fed-up of repeatedly having to clean up garages and sheds of their ­droppings and feathers.

One rescue worker says she is now having to care for 100 owls at her sanctuary.

Harry Potter had a snowy owl named Hedwig, who went on adventures with him and sometimes delivered his mail. In reality, of course, owls spend much more time killing mice and pooping than adventuring, and they almost never deliver envelopes to the location you intend. Most Harry Potter fans are not going to have ready access to a twenty-foot aviary, a captive owl’s preferred digs, and the owls may not like living in a small flat. Continue reading

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Thoughts on Game of Thrones: “I hope it’s a very beautiful bridge”

This episode was really nothing but battle prep. The theme seemed to be “doing what must be done.”

Qhorin Halfhand, captive of the wildlings along with Jon Snow, told Jon explicitly that he must do what needs to be done. We don’t know exactly what that is yet (well, I think I do, but I’m not telling.)

Daenerys must go to the House of the Undying to save her dragons. This scene in the book was a twenty-page acid trip. I can’t wait.

Tyrion must mount a defense of King’s Landing, basically by himself. Everyone else is caught up in their own petty crap. Tyrion enjoys the “Game,” as does Tywin. Cersei and Jaime hate it. All three of Tywin’s children have relied on their family’s wealth all their lives, but Tyrion has had to develop the most skills in order to survive. Both Cersei and Jaime showed remarkable clumsiness–Jaime by haphazardly killing Stark men, and Cersei by threatening and hurting the wrong woman while trying to get at Tyrion. Tyrion’s only weakness is Shae. Continue reading

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Thoughts on Game of Thrones: You Know Nothing, Jon Snow

NOTE: This is about the episode “A Man Without Honor,” which aired May 13. I’m just behind on my blogging.

I’m happy because Ygritte said her catchphrase.

As for spoilers, yes, there probably will be some.

I took my own advice from last week and put the books as far out of my mind as posible during this week’s episode. As I was watching the episode, I realized that, for the first time since the shpw premiered last year, I felt real dramatic tension. Previously, I felt tension from knowing what was going to happen but not knowing exactly how the producers would show it, or how the actors would convey it. Now, all bets are off, and it is awesome.

In that vein, I’m going to look at last night’s events in light of how they relate to other aspects of the show.

Arya/Tywin –> Arya/Ned

I am fascinated by the quasi father-daughter relationship building between Arya Stark and Tywin Lannister. Tywin is, in his own way, showing her a remarkable amount of warmth and kindness. I suspect he is playing his own game, as he clearly knows she is not who she claims to be. Perhaps he is keeping his enemies closer, but then again he is allowing her access to quite a bit of intel. Arya, of course, has no means to do anything with this intel (that she knows of.) Tywin, I think it is fair to say, values strength above all else. His own children, Cersei, Jaime, and Tyrion, have their own kinds of strength. Tyrion is by far the most like his father, but neither of them would ever admit that. Arya is very much like Tyrion, a person born with traits that greatly disadvantage them in their world, but that also hide great reserves of strength and cunning. I wonder if Tywin Lannister sees in Arya the traits he does not want to see in Tyrion. Continue reading

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Further evidence that bald is beautiful

Don’t watch this at work. I really don’t know what is going on in this video. She doesn’t look very happy, but it seems to all be part of the show:

If I’ve learned one thing in my own hair experience, it is that you have no way of knowing if you will look good bald until you actually lose the hair. She seems to pull it off pretty well. Here’s the description posted to YouTube:

Babi Panicat fica careca no Programa Pânico na Band Panico na TV RASPA raspando cabelo da panicat de babi ao vivo na BAND panico na band careca programa de 22/05/2012 22/04/12

And here’s the same text after getting the Yahoo! Babelfish treatment:

Babi Panicat is bald in the Program Panic in the Band Panic in the TV SCRAP scraping hair of panicat of babi to the living creature in the BAND panic in band bald program of 22/05/2012 22/04/12

I think the technology needs a bit of work. That, or the above text is not in Portuguese.

If you want to see more, or you speak Portuguese and want some broader context, YouTube has a longer video.

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Scary Childhood Memories: The Bunyip

I had managed to completely erase this bit of scarring from conscious memory until a Cracked writer had to go dig it up. The 1977 Australian children’s movie “Dot and the Kangaroo,” which I vaguely remember watching in what would have been the early 1980’s on cable TV (probably HBO), mostly consisted of singing cartoon animals like koalas and the eponymous kangaroo.

It also had a musical sequence, in a style unlike anything else in the movie, about the mythical bunyip. Try to watch this from the perspective of an 8 year-old:

Of course, growing up in the middle of a big city in Texas like I did, the bunyip didn’t exactly pose a great threat to me:

The bunyip, or kianpraty, is a large mythical creature from Aboriginal mythology, said to lurk in swamps, billabongs, creeks, riverbeds, and waterholes. The origin of the word bunyip has been traced to the Wemba-Wemba or Wergaia language of Aboriginal people of South-Eastern Australia. However, the bunyip appears to have formed part of traditional Aboriginal beliefs and stories throughout Australia, although its name varied according to tribal nomenclature. In his 2001 book, writer Robert Holden identified at least nine regional variations for the creature known as the bunyip across Aboriginal Australia. Various written accounts of bunyips were made by Europeans in the early and mid-19th century, as settlement spread across the country.

Dammit, though, that shit is terrifying to a kid.

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Next Stop, Delta City: How Robocop Predicted the Future

Robocop movie poster, Copyright 1987, Orion Pictures [Fair use], via WikipediaPaul Verhoeven’s Robocop (1987) was a stupid, silly, implausible, satirical, strangely-brilliant, unsettlingly-prescient movie about a cyborg police officer created by a corporation angling to take over Detroit’s city government. What’s interesting is that part of that premise might be happening now. What’s disappointing is that it has nothing to do with cyborgs:

Detroit is a city in flux. There are bright spots — pockets of development, a vibrant art scene, sophisticated restaurants, and a growing number of community gardens — but signs of life are overshadowed by miles and miles of blight. Last May, the state turned Detroit’s public schools over to an emergency manager, a businessman named Roy Roberts with a long history in the auto industry and financial markets.

***

Could Detroit become the first major city in America to have all of its public services privatized? Signs are pointing in that direction. The question for those living on the precipice in the Metro Detroit area is whether to stay and turn things around or leave before they get worse.

Continue reading

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You had a good run, NBC, but there will be no forgiveness for this

As far as I am concerned, 30 Rock and Community are two of the greatest sitcoms of the past few decades. That could just be that the sitcom format has evolved to the point where the bizarre meta-narrative offered by these shows is one of the few original ideas left. Community has a brilliant ability to dangle standard sitcom tropes in your face, make you think you know where the show is going, and then surprise you. 30 Rock is a television comedy about television comedy, always skirting the event horizon of its own humorous singularity. I’m not good at cosmological metaphors, so I hope that made sense.

Anyway, both shows have persisted despite, as the hipsters might say, being too good for the TV masses. Community even made a triumphant comeback from the brink of semi-cancellation. Still, it’s disappointingly unsurprising that NBC may “gently” cancel both shows, along with the almost-as-brilliant Parks and Recreation:

A trio of devastating television developments today: NBC reportedly plans to raze 75 percent of its beloved Thursday-night comedy lineup. The rumored casualties: 30 Rock, Community, and Parks and Recreation—all three of which represent some of the smartest (if only moderately watched) comedic output by any network right now. Instead of canceling the shows outright, the Peacock network will reportedly announce shortened final seasons for each at next week’s annual “upfront” presentation in New York City. The fourth Thursday-night sitcom, The Office, which is in its eight season, is predicted to remain on the air.

Bite me, NBC.

Where's my mac 'n' cheese?

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“I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself”

'Where The Wild Things Are' by Scott Woods-Fehr, on FlickrI only ever read one book by Maurice Sendak, Where the Wild Things Are. The man deserves a permanent place in the pantheon of literary giants just for the term “wild rumpus,” as far as I am concerned. As you may know, Maurice Sendak died earlier this week. I remember his book well from childhood. I’d like to read it again, but I can’t find my copy.

Sendak’s death has brought much expression of support and admiration for the man, along with some admissions of confusion over the book. I remember that Where the Wild Things Are was a different kind of book. This was not the shiny happy playtime childhood that I usually saw on PBS. Max was an unhappy child, and this story looked into some dark places in a child’s mind. He found a place where he could be happy, and be at peace, in a sense. Despite that, Max decided to come home. That is the real gift of this book: the message that it is okay for a child to be angry, or unhappy, or scared. Max is an imperfect child in an imperfect world, just like any of us.

He was a fascinating man, too, with quite a few opinions, as Stephen Colbert learned:

The Colbert Report Mon – Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Grim Colberty Tales with Maurice Sendak Pt. 1
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog Video Archive

He had a committed relationship with another man for fifty years, whom he was never allowed to marry. He originally conceived Where the Wild Things Are as Where the Wild Horses Are, but he found that he couldn’t draw horses, so they became “wild things.” Also, according to that video, “wild rumpus” might have actually meant sex after all.

Also, I realize that the title of this post is from a D.H. Lawrence poem. It just fits here.

Thanks for your book. It got me through what seemed like some rough patches of childhood.

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