After spending the last few days dodging lanyard-clad pedestrians in my car as I slogged through newfound downtown traffic, a few questions occurred to me.

1. Is musical talent somehow incompatible with the use of soap and/or deoderant?

2. Do you honestly think the green hair looks good, or is this just your way of pointing out the essential shallowness of our materialistic culture in the most attention-grabbing way possible?

3. Seriously, what’s up with the B.O.?

4. Thank you for staying out of my neighborhood. You can have downtown for a few days, I suppose, but leave my neighborhood alone.

5. Thanks again for leaving. Smell ya later (seriously).