This Week in WTF, March 8, 2014

– Stand Your Sacred Realm: Two men in Houston got in a scuffle, leading to perhaps the geekiest instance of self-defense in Texas history (h/t Jason). A man got into an argument with his girlfriend, which was apparently bad enough that she called her ex-husband. The ex shows up and….well, just read:

Thompson’s girlfriend let the man inside. Thompson said he ran to the back bedroom and told the man to leave the house, but he refused and started charging at him. That’s when Thompson says he grabbed his replica master sword from ‘The Legend of Zelda.’

Not pictured: Anything that actually happened in Houston

Not pictured: Anything that actually happened in Houston

Adult Link managed to fight the guy off, but apparently the ex-husband went full Dodongo or something. Police say he got the ex-husband out of the house, but the ex “broke through the front door” to get back in. (There’s probably a better final boss to invoke here, but I’m going with Ocarina of Time‘s Dodongo.)

Dodongo ended up with stabs wounds to the leg and chest. He was taken to the hospital in serious condition, suggesting that he’s at least a mid-level enemy. Link took a flower pot to the head. I can’t think of an analogy to the game for that one.

Link told Click2Houston, “I am just trying to figure out what to do from here. I have to find a new place to live.” I hear Termina is nice…

– This wouldn’t be creepy at all: Facebook, according to rumors, is considering buying a company that manufactures aerial drones in order to provide internet access to underserved parts of the world. Because if there’s one thing people in underserved parts of the world probably just love to see in their skies, it’s American-made UAVs.

– Meanwhile, in Australia: A snake fights a crocodile. The snake wins, and eats the crocodile. Actually, it would be more accurate to say that the snake swallows the crocodile.

David Thorne was not kidding when he said that Australia’s “primary spoken language is screaming.”

– BUT FLORIDA WILL NOT BE UPSTAGED!!! Florida will see Australia’s crocodile-fighting-killing-and-eating snake, and raise it one otter fighting, killing, and eating an alligator. Sure, it’s a baby alligator, but the pictures allow you to pretend that the otter is some sort of radioactive mutant. You know, the sort of monstrosity you might expect to see in Australia.

Share

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *