Learning Not to Hate

Per a friend ‘s Facebook post, there is a rumor that Fred Phelps is dying. It is surprisingly difficult to know how to feel about this, or whether I should even feel anything at all. I like the way my friend put it: “I’m not glad he’s dying. But I sure as hell ain’t sad.”

There is also a rumor, which the church will not confirm, that Phelps was excommunicated last summer, whatever that means.

How much real influence has Westboro Baptist Church really had? Has it really been a force for hate and/or evil in the world, or just sort of an oddity? It gave us a Supreme Court ruling that confirmed things we already knew about free speech. To an extent, though, WBC’s protests have galvanized opposition to their kind of hate.

You might say, however, that WBC has given cover to less ostentatious homophobes, who can truthfully say that whatever they may do to fight against marriage equality and LGBTQ rights, at least they never picket funerals. That said, WBC probably undercut its own mission by picketing military funerals, thereby driving away all those potential right-wing allies.

I would never celebrate anyone’s death (although I can’t say I’ve always held to that.) On a larger scale, Phelps’ death will mean that his particular brand of hatred is one step closer to dying out. On a smaller, more personal scale, it makes me sad that anyone goes to their grave with that much fear and hatred in them, and leaves that sort of legacy behind.

All I can really predict with any confidence is that Phelps and the WBC will be, at best, a footnote in the “miscellaneous” section of human history. Keith Brekhus said it quite well at PoliticusUSA:

As Fred Phelps approaches his final days, the temptation to attend his funeral, once he passes, with a “God hates Fred” sign, might be tough to resist. However, a stronger message would be to avoid his funeral altogether rather than answering hate with hate. Besides, if he was ex-communicated last year, it is almost a sure bet that the surviving members who have not yet left Westboro Baptist Church, will be picketing his funeral. Ironically they will be holding signs arguing that this bitter, hateful man was not hateful enough. If so, their hateful signs will serve as a tragically fitting reminder to the legacy Reverend Phelps will leave behind.

Believe it or not, Mr. Phelps, but I do not hate you. I also do not envy a life so full of anger and hatred like the one you seem to have led. I doubt much of anything can atone for that sort of life, but I do hope you find some kind of peace.

See also: this (h/t Sarah). Definitely see what George Takei said.

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