The things you find on YouTube. This is completely SFW, and Buffy fans may find this to be a remarkably astute recreation of the characters and settings:

Aside, of course, from the fact that these are probably all the scenes in the movie where people aren’t schtupping. Still, you know there’s serious geek cred here when an actress goes by the name April O’Neil (of Ninja Turtle fame, of course).

Also, it’s directed by a guy named Josh Wheldon:

Well you wouldn’t want to use your real name would you?

Lexi Belle stars as Buffy The Vampire Slayer in this XXX Porn Parody from Adam & Eve Pictures. Intriguingly, porn budgets and technological availability now seem to have reached the levels of mid nineties network TV. The staked porny vampires disappear into ash in pretty much the identical fashion they did back on the original series. Then, it was cutting edge telly. Now it’s available on a cheap parody porn budget.

Jessie Andrews is Willow, Tom Byron is Giles, Rocco Reed is Angel, and I’m sure you’ll have fun googling those names. And yes, the writer is one “Josh Wheldon”. It all has the sheen of the first couple of seasons of the original. There’s some things they just don’t get right though. Michael Reed, say, has a much more convincing fake English accent than James Marsters did…

I’m actually having a hard time coming up with snarky things to say. I wonder if they’ve worked “Mr. Pointy” into the storyline. I’ll let Dustin Rowles fill in the rest:

The question isn’t why is there a “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” porn parody. The question is: Why has it taken so long? The Whedon universe is rabid; they will watch and buy anything with the smell of “Buffy.” Adam & Eve pictures should already be on their 10th porn sequel by now, and the great thing is: There’s a hundred different plotlines they could recycle. Just stay away from the episode where Buffy’s mom dies, cause that’s a total boner killer.

I already checked, and there is no “Firefly” XXX parody in the works. Yet. I did find a blog post in which a Summer Glau fan opined (NSFW) on who should play River Tam in what is probably now the inevitable parody:

Summer Glau, of “Firefly” fame…

…sort of looks like Shyla Jennings, of a, uh, different filmography.

If nothing else, it would add further layers of meaning to the word “shiny.”